Friday, January 28, 2011

In moments of clarity

i realize just how broken i am. i see how my failures impact everyone around me - & how my lack of character costs them...
In moments of clarity - i snuggle closer to the tiny form huddled under my covers in the space usually filled by my husband. i curl my body around my little boy's warmth, and inhale his sweetness.
In moments of clarity - i miss Neil so bad that i'm pretty sure it's a sin. i ache for him with a longing that leaves me full of sadness.
In moments of clarity - i'm immobilized.
Today - i was cleaning up. Arms full of toys books, pens, paper, a little sweater, a tea towel...
& a moment of clarity hit.
i stood for just a moment - then flung my burden - (yes - flung it) to the ground. i fairly stumbled to my piano - & played the song before me...

There Is A Redeemer.

Redeem me, Jesus. Pay my ransom and restore my worth.
Use my moments of clarity to draw me deeper into your embrace...

4 comments:

Jen said...

Oh, P.
God is using you and in your brokeness He is refining you, making your character even more beautiful.
Hugs.
Seriously. Come over for coffee ;)

Juanita Rose said...

Blessings Paige.. beloved of your Father...he sees you clearly and you are illuminated...
Glory in your weaknesses..for His strength is perfected in them...
xox

fawne said...

paige....your brokenness and realness encourages me. you are a beautiful woman and have so impacted my life for good. i *love* this post.

mamalena said...

swallowing hard.....

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